by Fr. Justin Fulton
I like to submit this abbreviated version of a reflection on Father John Zastrow, by a caregiver of his, Sister Andrea. He died Feb. 2 at the age of 97. God rest him and God bless you for your support of our priests, sisters, and Catholic Social Services of Southern Nebraska!
My name is Sr. M. Andrea. I, along with Sr. M. Joan and Sr. Maria Christi live and work at Bonacum House (our home for the retired priests). We do the cooking, cleaning, and the laundry for our priests. Most importantly is that we are spiritual mothers to the priests. Yes, even in old age, they need a mother to love and care for them.
About 14 years ago Fr. Larry Gyhra (one of Fr. Zastrow’s close priest friends) was diagnosed with cancer. Fr. Zastrow came into the kitchen and said, “You are the closest one I have to a mom right now and I need to tell you about my friend.” At the age of 26, I was humbled by this statement. It is truly an honor to be able to serve our retired priests in life and an even greater honor to assist them in death. Someone once told me that each priest we assist in their death, they will be present to assist us in our death. I sure hope this is true.
I have been privileged and honored to care for Fr. Zastrow for the past 15 years. I will admit that I was a bit intimidated by him when I first arrived at Bonacum House shortly after my first Profession of vows. Perhaps it was his big, bushy eyebrows that intimidated me. Years later he told me he kept them that way to scare people. But quickly added “that is what makes me loveable.”
One of the sisters assured me that if he teased, it meant that he liked you. I was no longer afraid of him or his comments so we developed a very close and snarky relationship. He would affectionately call me “the kid” and I called him “John Boy” (up to the day he died).
At Bonacum House, it is common to see the priests in the chapel throughout the day praying their Divine Office or spending quiet time with the Lord. It was not unusual in the afternoon to see Fr. Zastrow walking toward the chapel for his daily Holy Hour with a cup of coffee in one hand and his cordless phone sticking out of his pants pocket. One day I jokingly asked, “Do you think you are that popular that you need to bring your phone with you to the Chapel?” Without missing a beat, he said, “If someone calls and needs to go to confession, I don’t want them to have to remain in the state of sin any longer than necessary.” Needless to say, I never made fun of him for carrying his cordless phone around after that.
Once I asked Father to do something, but he quickly told me, “I am my own man.” I laughed! He then came back with, “but during my Holy Hour, I am Jesus’ man.” I was inspired as I watched him pray. It was apparent that he was in conversation with the Lord and he knew himself to be loved by Him.
Father had a list of names of people he promised to pray for. Any sister who ever filled in at Bonacum House for any period of time was on his prayer list. On several occasions he would tell me his list was too long and should take some of the people off … but would thoughtfully add, “I just can’t, because they might need one more prayer.” Prayer was his priority. He made sure that he always offered a Holy Hour whether there was sporting event or people visiting him, he would make the time to be Jesus’ man.
On a lighter note, Father went through this phase when he thought it was necessary to wear both a belt and a pair of suspenders. I told him that he looked a little bit dorky. He came back with, “Well, after all, I am my own dork.” I could always count on a dry, witty comeback.
In December of last year, we noticed that Father had an open wound on his foot that would not heal due to poor circulation below the knee. A major operation was scheduled, but it would have been too much for Father’s already weakened heart. I was able to spend a good amount of time with him when he was in the hospital for six days. During the course of one of our many conversations he said, “God has been good to me because I have not suffered much in my life.” After Father was discharged from the hospital, he was put on hospice care and brought him back home to Bonacum House. One night I went to check on Father Zastrow before going to bed to see if there was anything he needed. He was all set. As I was leaving his room, I said “Goodnight Father, I love you.” He looked at me and said “I love you too, but that doesn’t take away the sore on my foot.”
We were able to care for Fr. Zastrow at Bonacum House for nine days before it became necessary for him to be admitted to Madonna Dec. 21. A few days later I came across this quote from Saint Francis of Assisi, which sums up what Father told me when he was in the Hospital.
“No matter what happens to them, they should give thanks to the Creator. They should desire for themselves whatever the Lord wills for them, be it healthy or sick.” (Rule and Life of St. Francis #23). Father John confidently placed his life in the hands of the Father trusting in His care for him.
When asked by Sister Celeste what he was most proud of in his many years of priestly ministry he simply stated, “I am most proud of being called to the priesthood.” I have heard that Father was a very good administrator. He once told me that the students swallowed their gum when they saw him walking down the hall. However, they respected and admired him.
Father Zastrow belonged to Jesu Caritas… he always looked forward to his monthly meeting with his brother priests. Daily he prayed the prayer of abandonment by Charles de Foucauld. He told me once that he prays it and then at the end adds… but Lord ask me first. Recently, we prayed the Abandonment prayer together and he was peaceful as he once again abandoned himself to God:
Father, I abandon myself into your hands; do with me what you will. Whatever you may do, I thank you: I am ready for all, I accept all. Let only your will be done in me, and in all your creatures- I wish no more than this, O Lord. Into your hands I commend my soul: I offer it to you with all the love of my heart, for I love you, Lord, and so need to give myself, to surrender myself into your hands without reserve, and with boundless confidence, for you are my Father. (Charles de Foucauld)
Recently when I was visiting with Father John at Madonna, I asked him his favorite gospel passage. He said that is hard to answer. I assumed he would say the Beatitudes… he said with a smile on his face and a twinkle in his eye, “I like them, but don’t really understand them. Actually, I like when Jesus said “Come follow Me” to the disciples.” I am sure that in the final hour of Fr. Zastrow’s life on the Feast of the Presentation of the Lord he heard the Lord gently and lovingly say to him once again, “Come Follow Me… to the place I have prepared for you.”
Perhaps the Lord will ask him to help rearrange things in Heaven since he mastered it in his living room on a daily basis (this is not a joke). We never knew where we would find things from one morning to the next.
Eternal rest grant unto Fr. John, oh Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon him. May his soul and all the souls of the faithful departed through the mercy of God rest in peace. Amen. Rest in peace, “John Boy.”
